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Forum: Engineering Jokes

Jokes about engineers to brighten your day! Please no offensive jokes in this forum. users posting offensive material will be banned.

  1. 10 Good Reasons for You to Date and Marry an Engineer

    10 Good Reasons for You to Date and Marry an Engineer 1. The world does not revolve around us. We choose the coordinate system. 2. No "couple"...

    Started by juniorlep‎, 10-30-2007 02:03 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 5,738
    06-08-2010, 11:15 AM Go to last post
  2. Talking Female Engineers...

    File their nails with a Leatherman. Make jewelry out of wire, resistors, transistors, and chips. Don't think of male engineers as dorks. ...

    Started by miguel‎, 04-09-2010 03:44 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 746
    04-09-2010, 03:44 PM Go to last post
  3. You Might be an Engineer If...

    ... the only jokes you receive are through e-mail. ... you can't write unless the paper has both horizontal and vertical lines. ... you order...

    Started by miguel‎, 04-09-2010 03:41 PM
    • Replies: 2
    • Views: 786
    04-09-2010, 03:43 PM Go to last post
  4. Engineers vs. God

    One day a group of engineers got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. They picked one engineer to go and tell...

    Started by miguel‎, 04-09-2010 03:37 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 623
    04-09-2010, 03:37 PM Go to last post
  5. Engineer's Diet

    We all know that it takes 1 calorie to heat 1 gram of water 1 degree celsius. Translated into meaningful terms, this means that if you eat a very...

    Started by miguel‎, 04-09-2010 03:34 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 972
    04-09-2010, 03:34 PM Go to last post
  6. Engineers and the Jet

    Back in the 60's, a jet manufacturer was trying to build a jet that would go mach 4 (4 times the speed of sound for you non-aeronautical types)....

    Started by miguel‎, 04-09-2010 03:32 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 575
    04-09-2010, 03:32 PM Go to last post
  7. Engineers and Lawyers

    There was once an engineer who found a magic lamp. When he rubbed it, a genie jumped out and said to him, "You have three wishes. But there is a...

    Started by miguel‎, 04-09-2010 03:26 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 598
    04-09-2010, 03:26 PM Go to last post
  8. Change of job...

    It seems a gynaecologist, who was getting sick of his job, decided that he needed a career change. He'd always enjoyed tinkering with engines, so he...

    Started by merryengineer‎, 03-08-2010 08:01 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 760
    03-08-2010, 08:01 PM Go to last post
  9. Parts Store

    Ole came out of the local Fleet & Farm store and saw Sven driving thru the parking lot on his tractor pulling a chain. Sven, says Ole, how come you...

    Started by merryengineer‎, 03-08-2010 07:59 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 468
    03-08-2010, 07:59 PM Go to last post
  10. Knox Engines

    Old Maine fisherman saying: Don't worry if you see a Knox engine falling from the sky aimed for your head ..... It will stop before it reaches you.

    Started by merryengineer‎, 03-08-2010 07:57 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 516
    03-08-2010, 07:57 PM Go to last post
  11. John Deere Engines.....

    "Nothing runs like a Deere, ... or smells like a john". lol

    Started by merryengineer‎, 03-08-2010 07:55 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 572
    03-08-2010, 07:55 PM Go to last post
  12. Engineering Students....

    How many first year engineering students does it take to change a light bulb? None. That's a second year subject. How many second year...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:26 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,822
    03-10-2006, 12:26 PM Go to last post
  13. You might be an engineer....

    your favorite James Bond character is "Q". you see a good design and still have to change it. you still own a slide rule and you know how to...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:25 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,485
    03-10-2006, 12:25 PM Go to last post
  14. How Engineers Do it....

    Engineers do it with precision. Electrical engineers are shocked when they do it. Electrical engineers do it on an impulse. Electrical engineers...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:24 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,346
    03-10-2006, 12:24 PM Go to last post
  15. Things Engineers Say...

    Major Technological Breakthrough Back to the drawing board. Developed after years of intensive research It was discovered by accident. The...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:23 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,861
    03-10-2006, 12:23 PM Go to last post
  16. Real Engineers...

    Real Engineers consider themselves well dressed if their socks match. Real Engineers buy their spouses a set of matched screwdrivers for their...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:23 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,297
    03-10-2006, 12:23 PM Go to last post
  17. Pick-Up Lines to use on Engineering Chicks

    I won't stop bugging you until I get the address of your home page. Let's convert our potential energy to kinetic energy. Wanna come back to my...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:22 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,333
    03-10-2006, 12:22 PM Go to last post
  18. After Receiving an Invitation to an Inventors' Ball:

    Edison thought it would be an illuminating experience. Watt reckoned it would be a good way to let off steam. Stephenson thought the whole...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:21 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,296
    03-10-2006, 12:21 PM Go to last post
  19. Top Ten Things Engineering School didn't Teach You

    There are at least 10 types of capacitors. Theory tells you how a circuit works, not why it does not work. Not everything works according to the...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:20 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,304
    03-10-2006, 12:20 PM Go to last post
  20. Some engineering sayings...

    The physician can bury his mistakes, but the architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. Frank Lloyd Wright Doctors bury their...

    Started by wellandpower‎, 03-10-2006 12:18 PM
    • Replies: 0
    • Views: 1,552
    03-10-2006, 12:18 PM Go to last post

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